Auburn Hate Week! Thursday - Alums, Co-Eds, Cheerleaders

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!  I thought for the holiday I would take a slightly more lighthearted approach to the Iron Bowl and compare the Alumni and the female hotness at both Universities.

Alumni:

 For a "Cow College", Auburn has a lot of Technical and Engineering Alums.

Non Athlete Alumni:

1. Walter Riggs - Father of Clemson Football
2. Alvin Vogtle - Fighter Pilot and Inspiration for Steve McQueen Character
3. Hank Harsfield - Shuttle Astronaut - Featured in The Dream is Alive
4. Clifton Williams - Gemini and Apollo Astronaut - Killed flying T-38 Aircraft
5. Fob James - Alabama Govenor
6. Ken Mattingly - Apollo and Shuttle Astronaut - Famous for getting booted from Apollo 13 flight
7. James Voss - Shuttle Astronaut
8. Kathryn Thornton - Shuttle Astronaut (I add her because I work with her neice)
9. Jan Davis - Shuttle Astronaut
10. Jimmy Wales - co-founder of Wikipedia
11. Taylor Hicks - American Idol (Attended but did not graduate)
    
12. Jimmy Buffet - Singer (Attended but did not graduate)

Pretty good list.  Lot of space flight on there.  How about Alabama? On their Wikipedia page, their list has to be broken down by category there are so many!

1. Winston Groom - Author Forest Gump
2. Harper Lee - Author To Kill a Mockingbird
3. Kathryn Scott - First female band director in United States
4. Bernard Madoff - Ponzi Scheme dude - (I DIDN'T KNOW HE WENT TO BAMA!!)
5. Jim Nabors - Actor
6. Sela Ward - Acress
7. Bob Riley - Governor
8. Jess Sessions - Senator
9. Richard Shelby - Senator
10. Don Sigelman - Governor
11. George Wallace - Governor

Advantage:  Push

If you like politics, then Alabama is your place.  You pretty much have to be a member of one of the Machine fraternities or sororities to get anywhere, but it is possible.  If you like engineering and Space Travel, Auburn may well be your place.  I want to give this to Alabama, but given my current "real" job where I teach about Space, I'll have to at least bring this to a push

What About Athletic Alumni?

Auburn:

1. Charles Barkley
2. Bo Jackson
3. Ronnie Brown
4. Frank Thomas (baseball)
   
5. Vince Dooley
6. Shug Jordan
7. Kevin Greene
8. Carnell "Cadillac" Williams
9. Jason Campbell
10. Carlos Rodgers
11. Kristy Coventry (Olympic swimming Gold Medalist)
12. Brandon Jacobs
13. Tim Hudson (baseball)

Not a bad list, Here is Alabama:

1. Paul W. "Bear" Bryant
2. Joe Namath
3. Ken Stabler
4. Bart Starr
5. Dwight Stephenson
6. John Hannah
7. Don Hutson
8. Ozzie Newsome
9. Derrick Thomas
10. Cornelius Bennett
11. Shaun Alexander
12. Chris Samuels
13. DeMeco Ryans
14. Glen Coffee
15. Roman Harper (I HAD A CLASS WITH HIM!)
    
16. Antwan Odom
17. Rece Davis (Sportscaster ESPN)
    
18. Mo Williams (Basketball)
19. Latrell Sprewell (Basketball)
20. Mel Allen (The Voice of the Yankees)
21. Terin Humphrey (Olympic Silver Medalist - Gymnastics)
22. Anne Poleska - Olympic Bronze Medalist - Swimming (I HAD A CLASS WITH HER!)

Advantage:  Alabama

I didn't even write out all the good Alabama names I found.  You can look at the complete list here for Auburn and Alabama.

Thats all well and good and I'm glad we got the serious stuff out of the way.  Now, its time for the Women!

There is no good way to determine which school has the best looking girls.  They are both fantastic.  I'm just using the small sampling of photos I've been able to find online of girls wearing the gear from each school.

Alabama:

 

Pretty good Quality for Alabama.  Now, Auburn:

dsfsdf

Advantage:  Auburn

Not really that I think the Auburn chicks are cuter, because they really aren't.  I love my Crimson Chicks!  But, Auburn girls were easier to find on a google image search.

The Cheerleaders:

Funny cheerleader story.  At the 2003 Iron Bowl, ESPN interviewed an Alabama male cheerleader who on national television confessed he grew up an Auburn fan and was rooting for Auburn despite being an Alabama cheerleader.  The next day, he was off the team.  But, there will be no male cheerleaders here.  Time for more SEC women:

Auburn:

And Alabama:

Advantage:  Alabama

Much like the Auburn co-ed search:  The Alabama cheerleaders were MUCH easier to find online quickly.  Plus they amazingly gorgeous.  Even though those candid shots of the girls rolling around on the grass are great, they are still Auburn and I have to throw up a little bit when I see them.

That's it for today!  Happy Thanksgiving, continue hating Auburn!  ROLL TIDE!

ONE MORE DAY!!!!!!

Tomorrow's Post:  Game Analysis and prediction

The GURU Live on the Radio - Week 3

Back for a third week, the guys at Boston Game Time had the GURU on the air Friday night to discuss the upcoming action in college football.  This week, we talked about:

Boise State's dominating victory
Lack of quality games for the weekend
Alabama vs. Mississippi State review
Heisman Candidates
Boise State's Kellen Moore
Weekend Slate of Games
Texas vs. Texas A&M
Alabama vs. Auburn IRON BOWL
Kansas Coach Mangino Stuff
Rivalry Games for the Weekend
Boston College vs. North Carolina
Boston College's season to date
Recruiting rankings
Alabama vs. the Mocs and Auburn
Looking ahead to the conference title game, who recruited better?
Looking ahead to debating the playoff systems

Check out the GURU'S segment here

Listen to the whole show here - Or you can just click the link of the side of the page!


Check out all of the Game Time podcasts here

And don't forget to listen live every week, Friday Night at www.wmfo.org LIVE Midnight - 2AM Eastern (11pm-1am Central)

It looks like The GURU will be a weekly segment at least for the rest of the college football season.  Check it out every week.

Auburn Hate Week! Wednesday - Quotes, Jokes, House Divided

Depending on who you ask, Alabama's biggest rival may not be Auburn.  Ask a current student and they may say LSU is the biggest, toughest rival.  Ask either a really old fan and they will tell you it is Tennessee because we didn't even play Auburn for 40 years and Tennessee is the 2nd best team in the SEC's history and they are the toughest competition.  Fans in their late 20s and early 30s will also hate Tennessee because of the whole Secret Witness stuff.

But ask anyone with any sense, and they will know it is Auburn.  Here are some things Coach Bryant used to say about the Auburn game:

"Sure I'd like to beat Notre Dame, don't get me wrong. But nothing matters more than beating that cow college on the other side of the state."
 ~To a group of Boosters

" What the hell's the matter with you people down there? Don't y'all take your football seriously?"

~Bryant after calling Auburn early in the morning to find the not at the office yet

If you think Saban has gotten away from the rivalry at all...

"We have an opponent in this state that we work every day, 365 days a year, to dominate."

The Jokes

No great rivalry would be complete without some jokes going back and forth at eachother's fan bases, cheerleaders etc...  Here are some of my favorites:

How do you castrate an Auburn fan?
Kick his sister in the teeth

How do you get an Auburn fan off your porch?
Pay him for the pizza.

Why can't Sex ed. and Driver's ed be done on the same day at Auburn?
Because they only have one mule

What is the most common line used with by an Auburn alum?
Would you like fries with that

What is a 7 course meal at Auburn?
Possum and a six-pack

How did Tommy Tuberville keep his players out of the bars after the 2008 Alabama game?
Paint an goal line at the door - his players can't cross it

Of course for full disclosure, there are a couple of Anti-Alabama jokes that are kinda ok:

Where wasa O.J.headed in the White Bronco?
Tuscaloosa:  No one would think to look for a Heisman winner there

How many Bama fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but it takes a roomful to talk about how the BEAR would have done it better

How are Bama fans and Maggots alike?
Both can live off of a dead Bear for years

You can find dozens of these all over the interwebz, or just click here for a bunch

A House Divided:

We've all seen the license plates, the flags, and all of that stuff with "A House Divided" written on it.  My first experience with this was at the 2002 Iron Bowl walking to the stadium from work behind a couple - one a Bama fan and one an Auburn fan.  The two were holding hands and getting a variety of looks from fans on both sides of the street until one Alabama looks up and says "It will never work!  Get a divorce now!"  One of my favorite lines from my early years of being an Alabama fan still getting used to football in the south.  There are also all kinds of stories about divorce filings where on the "irreconcilable differences" section things like "she's an Auburn fan" are listed very early on the list.

When you grow up in this state (which I didn't) you go to school with fans of both allegiances.  So naturally, when it comes to college, you will have friends that go to the rival school.  This rivalry is truly one of those "House Divided" places.  Last Thanksgiving - two days before the game, I was at a Thanksgiving dinner with my then girlfriend's family.  Before dinner, everyone was asked to hold hands and give thanks for the meal.  At the end, someone yelled out ROLL TIDE and before hands could be let go, the other side yelled out WAR EAGLE!!  It is everywhere in this state.


But no one, and I mean NO ONE can talk about taking it to the next level.  Take a look at this family.

TWO MORE DAYS!!!

Tomorrow:   Which school has better and more influential Alums, hotter co-eds, and hotter cheerleaders?

Auburn Hate Week! Tuesday - Biggest Alabama Wins

It wouldn't be one of the greatest rivalries in sports if there weren't some great moments to go with it.  Here are my top BAMA moments from this great game.

1.  1948:  The Rivalry Renewed

The the first time since 1907, Alabama and Auburn renewed their hostilities on the Field.  Alabama took the return contest 55-0 in the most lopsided win in the series history.

2.  1964:  National Broadcast

For the first time ever, the Alabama-Auburn game was televised nationally.  Quarterback Joe Namath led Alabama to the victory.  But this kick return by Ray Ogden was the play of the game.

3.  1967:  The Run in the Mud

THE SNAKE!!!!  In what was a defensive struggle all night, Ken Stabler took the ball around right end and gave us one of the most memorable plays in Alabama history.  Don't mention this to an Auburn fan though, unless you want to hear "BLOCK IN THE BACK" 400 times.

4.  1971:  Battle of the Undefeateds

The winner of this game would go on to play Nebraska in the Orange Bowl for a de-facto National Championship game.  Alabama may have lost to Nebraska in that game, but they defeated Auburn and Heisman trophy winner Pat Sullivan on this night.

5.  1981:  315

There is nothing sweeter than passing one of the greatest milestones in your sport against your biggest and most hated rival, but that is what happened here.  Alabama coach Paul "Bear" Bryant passed Amos Alonzo Stagg as the winningest coach in college football history with his 315th victory.  Bryant would go on to win 323 career games.  His record stood until 2001 when Joe Paterno took the lead.

6.  1984:  Wrong Way Bo

4th and Goal and Auburn needs a touchdown.  Outstanding tailback was supposed to block to the right - he didn't.......

7.  1985:  "The Kick"

If you don't know about this play yet, I'm not telling you.  Probably the most famous play in Alabama football history - if not second behind "The Goal Line Stand."

8.  1992:  The Langham Pick

Alabama's defense had been stifling all season, and they were called upon again tonight.  Antonio Langham would later go to have an even more important interception against Florida in the first ever SEC Championship Game, but he added one for the highlight reel on this night as well.

9.  1994:  Ending Their Streak

Both teams were undefeated coming in, but Auburn was riding a 21 game unbeaten streak.  Thanks to their defense as always, Alabama came out on top on this night.

10.  1996:  Riddle and the Stallings Finale

Yet another Alabama comeback against the Barners.  Late in the game, Dennis Riddle took a swing pass into the end zone for the win.  Happiness was short lived however as Coach Gene Stallings would announce his retirement that night at the press conference.  Mike Dubose took over coach after that and.....well you know the rest.

11.  1999:  Victory on the Plains

Alabama's first win on the Plains game in the 1999 game win a dominating 28-17 game.

12.  2001:  Victory on the Plains II

Alabama hadn't had the best regular season losing some close games to inferior opponents.  But a late season surge had Alabama in position to make a bowl game to winning against Auburn and Southern Miss to cap the season.  Alabama were huge underdogs in the game, but a dominating 31-7 victory set up the Thursday night tilt with Southern Miss to send Alabama Bowling.

13.  2008:  Ending the Streak:  Bama is Back!

36-0.  'Nuff said.


Up tomorrow:  some great jokes and "house divided" stories on the Iron bowl